Confessions of a NFL Mistress Part 2
If you missed Part 1 of Confession of a NFL Mistress you can read it HERE.
Here is Part 2.
RL- You said his wife knew about you. Please explain how that relationship worked and did you have any confrontations?
Tina- Well, she’d heard of me long before I knew of her. I heard a rumor in Dec that he had a wife but I dismissed it because I lived with him. I mentioned it to him in passing but he laughed and warned me once again on how many people would talk [….]. BUT as his birthday grew near, the rumors got more frequent. Now, by this point my best friend and I were very distant because I didn’t realize he was cutting off she and his brother’s cash flow because of her talking to me about him, so she stopped answering my calls. I later found out it was all his doing, at that time she was “prego” and her hubby had no job other than what Frederick gave him.
Fast forward, I got an email from his wife. In it she said that despite our FLING she was there to stay. I didn’t write her back because when I spoke to him about it, he said she was a stalker and not his wife. The next time I was in Miami, I was out at a club and was approached by three women. They asked was I Tina, and of course I said YES! So the woman in the middle introduced herself as “Mrs.”, his wife. I laughed and said wonderful, I’m his girlfriend. Her girls starting running off at the mouth, I told her, you’ve been emailing, calling, and researching me for awhile, you know I’m not the one for this bullsh**. I started to walk off because I didn’t want him to be mad with me, because he hates drama. I was going to leave it alone BUT she let her friends boost her up to walk back up on me, so I hit her over the head with the Corona bottle.
Yep. I told her you let these whores get you f***** up over a d*** that you don’t have. SILLY ME! After that he informed me she was indeed his wife.
I went back to Cleveland with him and we talked. When he went to sleep I had a car service pick me up and I left, for a few weeks. But I had nowhere to go, no money, and he not only took care of me, he took care of my family too. So I took him back and I never had an issue with her after she realized I would beat her ass. We have spoken over the years. The bottom line is this. I loved him, she loved him and until one of us said NO MORE, we might as well have gotten along because this was life. That was my mind set and she agreed. I didn’t call him at night and she didn’t bother him in the day. We knew our positions and we played them. Sad but true.
RL- What are the pros and cons of being the mistress instead of the wife?
Tina- There’s no pros. I guess for whores the pro is the money and the trips, without the stress of commitment. But for me there were no pros. Money and things I would have gotten from any man I was with. Sure he was on a different level but I would have never been with a bum. Cons? You lose your self- worth. You begin to second guess everything you know about yourself and you start believing that this is what you deserve; being someone’s second or secret lover. You learn NOT to trust anyone. Girls become your friend just to meet the men you know and talk about you. MEN, once they know you have accepted the role as a mistress in your past, they treat you as such. You really have to reprogram yourself after you find the strength to end it.
RL- Share some of the things that he provided for you while you are in the relationship?
Tina- I quit my job a week into our relationship. He provided EVERYTHING! I’ve gotten a new car every year; I currently drive an Audi A8 2008. I have a two bedroom condo in midtown Miami. I also OWN my own company, which was started with money he provided. My daughter has been in a private school since 2005 and again I haven’t worked since 2004. I started my company at the end of 2007 but all my bills have been paid up until December 2008.
RL- With the advent of social media blogs, forums, twitter and etc., how did it affect you when you read some of the things that were said about you?
It hurt to read what people who had never seen me wrote about me and all the assumptions that were made. The fact that I look a certain way made me public enemy number one on a lot of the blogs. Never mind that I’m a black woman just like them, and I face the same hardships. But because my hair was curly and I was light, that made me a gold diggin’ h**?!?!? No one insulted him or his wife, only me! WTF?!? He married her, not me!
SHE knew about me before he married her. He lied to ME! By her own admission, HE NEVER LIED TO HER! HE TOLD HER BEFORE THE WEDDING there was someone else and to accept it or the wedding is off. SO why am I the bad guy?
I got used; I wasted years of my life. At least she has something to show. She lives in a mansion, NOT a condo. She wears the title as his wife, not me. However people are entitled to think what they like, the truth is she and I were both heartbroken, equally time and time again. When people exposed me online they never thought how that would hurt HER too. It hurts for the world to know you’re a fool. She and I were victims to a large degree. Hell, he got STDs, babies, & drama that didn’t come from her or I during our time together so all that blog bullshit just gave lesser bitches an audience. So who am I to deprive simple b******* of something to talk about? Screw them! They still want to be ME! Despite the bullshit they write, they’d die to switch places. They’re the women that men sleep with and keep it moving. I’m the woman men put up somewhere safe so no one else gets them (smile).
RL- Obviously you and the wife weren’t the only women in his life. How did it make you feel when you found out about the other women?
Tina- I cried, broke up with him, and even fought a few of the jump offs. Hell, he slept with one of my best friends when I broke up with him and never told me when we got back together. When I found out, that was the lowest point of my life. It wrecked everything I thought I knew.
You see, he always said sex was just physical so I never internalized him sleeping with some random chick.
Hell, I did threesomes with him to keep him happy or so I thought, but when he slept with someone so close to me it showed me that he was crazy or I was crazy. It became personal. Over the years I’ve forgiven so much but when someone told me about him and my friend, it felt like a truck had hit me head on.
I TRIED to forgive him and continue on but I couldn’t. When we slept together after that, I cried because all I could see was him f****** her. Even though he said he only did it because he was angry with me for leaving [it didn’t make it any better;] he had broken my heart so many times. I never once tried to hurt him. I never called his wife, I never went to the media, and I never talked about him publicly. I dealt with it all because I loved him so. But, when he slept with her it was the realization that it was all a lie! It took months to really breathe again.
RL- How did it finally come to an end and could you share the conversation recently you had with his wife asking you to come back?
Tina- I sent him an email. After trying to forgive him for sleeping with my close friend, I just couldn’t. I stayed up and cried and wrote him a simple note….. I can’t do this anymore. Please let me go.
He has written, called, and I’ve seen him. But loving him was killing me. I don’t have anything else to give, so it’s not even something I think about. Yes I miss him, I have lonely nights but I pray for strength and press on.
His wife loves him and because we had been in this situation so long, she knew when we are having problems because he was a terror at home. She called me recently to tell me she was worried about him, he is just staying in his office not leaving the house. He told her I wouldn’t see him and with all the changes he is making in other areas of his life he feels like I abandoned him, like he was played (HA!) So she asked would I please take his call and at least explain why I left so that they could start the new phase of their marriage, a marriage just between the two of them.