Elin Nordegren Lies About Hitting Tiger Woods to People Magazine

The views expressed by Robert Littal do not necessarily reflect the views of women who like to beat men with 9 Irons.

Before we start let me just say this is an opinion piece. I wasn’t there so I can’t say with 100% certainty what happened, but I do wear a detective hat and broke lamps in a Holiday Inn Express last night, so you might want to pay attention.

I wish I could hire Antoine Dodson to go over to Tiger’s house just to say:

“You so dumb…”

Tiger gives up at minimum 25% of his empire to Elin and somehow doesn’t get a gag order barring her from doing interviews? Was his lawyer name Marcia Clark or something?

With that being said here is what Elin had to say about the night she beat down Tiger:

“There was never any violence inside or outside our home,” she said. “The speculation that I would have used a golf club to hit him is just truly ridiculous.”

Nordegren said Woods left the house that night and when he didn’t return after a while, she got worried and went to look for him. She said that’s when she found him in the car.

“I did everything I could to get him out of the locked car,” she said. “To think anything else is absolutely wrong.”

The magazine said the interview was conducted over four visits lasting a total of 19 hours at the rented Windermere, Fla., home where she now lives with their two children.

“I’ve been through hell,” she said. “It’s hard to think you have this life, and then all of a sudden — was it a lie? You’re struggling because it wasn’t real. But I survived. It was hard, but it didn’t kill me.”

“I’m so embarrassed that I never suspected — not a one. For the past 3½ years, when all this was going on, I was home a lot more with pregnancies, then the children and my school.”

In the immortal words Joi in Friday:


I don’t care how many Applebees’ girls, Porn Stars or Madams Tiger has slept with:


She laid hands on Tiger and it wasn’t the first time trust me when I tell you that. She is also lying about not knowing that Tiger was creeping because she isn’t that stupid and naive.

What she is proving to be is very smart and very manipulative of the media. Poor Elin is so embarrassed that her husband cheated that she needed 100 plus million to ease her pain.

Tiger was wrong for cheating and you have to pay the piper if you get caught, but I don’t want to hear a sob story for Elin trust me she is going to be just fine.

12 hours after the accident I said:


That’s why they call me Robstadamous.


Why is this the #1 story on ESPN.com?  Are we really that interesting in the story of a wife of an athlete?

18 thoughts on “Elin Nordegren Lies About Hitting Tiger Woods to People Magazine

  • I can see the future…Elin and Kate Gosselin will become BFF, have guest spots on The View, and be come defense Secretary, and Secretary of Education respectively when Sara Palin becomes President..

  • The funniest part is how so many men are hating on Elin. The girl has been through enough, let her live. After potentially being exposed to AIDS, the herp and various other sexually transmitted cooties…. I’m not saying hitting Tiger with a 9 iron as right, but I definitely understand. Maybe she should have just shook the shit out of him.

    • It happens every day she isn't special

      • Oh, but she is. I don't care what she may have known. Having your significant other's disgusting ways aired out for EVERYONE to see everyday for months, kind of puts it in its own category.

        Life would be so much easier if more people would live by the following basic principle: You choose the action, you choose the consequences. Tiger has no one to blame but himself.

  • ESPN must have forgotten (ignored) Jay Mariotti's felony domestic assault. They would rather make Elin a front page story instead of pointing the finger at one of their own .

  • Every single word of this post is accurate, regardless of opinion. I said the same exact goddamn thing when I saw this buwlsheet on ESPN.com.

    She's embarassed, and she needs someone to "feel her pain". Of course, she won't disclose how much she netted from this debacle, but she WILL be the innocent victim and deny any claims that she is the 'badguy', because she needs to earn more sympathy points from the media. She can't have as much as a scar on her rep, because she's loving the fact that Tiger is taking all of the heat for this, though he deserves it.

    I'm surprised Tiger didn't have an ironclad contract that Barred her from as much as even BREATHING any information about the past incidents, and if he DOES have one, and she broke that contract, I would love to see how this blows up in her face.

    This is bullcrap to the higest degree. Okay Elin, you're hurt, you're pissed, you're embarassed. Stop trying to paint yourself as the perfect innocent wife, when in reality, that's most certainly not the case.

  • That chick knew exactly what she was getting into. She supposedly know about his sex addictions before they got married. She was waiting for this payday. People don’t think so but how long would you wait and plot to potentially get a half billion dollars. To do all the stuff he was supposedly into he had to be gone all the time. Now I know she is not black but she had to have some kind of intuition. Don’t play this lady for a fool she is not dumb.

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