What if Tom Brady Was Black? | Robert Littal Presents BlackSportsOnline

What if Tom Brady Was Black?

by Robert Littal | Posted on Friday, August 26th, 2011
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When Tom Brady plays, I see Unitas ball. I don’t mean the type of football that consists of black cleats and grainy TV Footage, I mean when everything breaks down it is all in great fun. The reading defenses, the pocket presence, the accuracy and the swag. Those moments when Brady slips pass a rushing Linebacker and looks off the safety is mythical almost Samson like in nature.

All of that is why, to me, Brady seems to have a deeply Caucasian approach to the game. I am not saying a white quarterback who is mobile ain’t playing white. I am saying that Brady is so stoic, efficient and cool it is just a representation of white style. If there was a stat for AWESOMENESS points, Brady would be by far the #1 quarterback in the league.

After Brady dumped his pregnant girlfriend for a hotter model the question has to be asked: Would a black football player have gotten such a pass for such a Mediatakeout type act?

Blackness comes with a lot of advantages, but not a get out of Mediatakeout Free card.

If you switch Brady to black then he would have black parents. I know this is shocking to me, but I learned from ESPN if you switch races you also switch parents. Amazing isnt it?

Who would this Black Brady be? Similar to Back to the Future, if you change one thing it can mess up the future as we know it. Would I be writing this article? Would a writer who knows nothing about sports but has a cool name like Toure’ (similar to Madonna) have an ESPN outlet to write nonsensical pieces about race, sports and culture?

If Brady was born to black parents, would he have a radically different life than the Brady who grew up in San Mateo, California where many white men see sports as a way to shag pretty blondes?

Would a black kid introduced to upgrading from the baby mama at a young age and have it become normalized to the extent that he builds it into his life after he joins the NFL? Probably not because upgrading women isn’t based on race, it is based of having options.

But if it did, would Brady had been busted? Would his perception in the NFL been different? Would he be able to sell Male UGGs to the masses.

Would he be rocking a face tattoo like Baby from Cash Money as oppose to a Beiber style haircut? Would his wife be a Twodel as oppose to a Victoria Secret Model?

Here is another question,  if Brady grew up in a fatherless home would have been less prone to sleep with multiple women raw dog? See in the hood they have stores on every corner so if Brady lived in that environment maybe Trojans would have been more accessible. Would Brady like Kool-Aid and Basketball Wives? Would he had have the advantages of knowing how to dance?

Brady’s father was a big part of his life. If he was black, according to the Toure types his father would have automatically abandoned him and he would have been force to idolize Nino Brown and slang crack from the block while listening to Raekwon.

Ultimately, there is no separating Brady from his circumstances: his race, parents, economics and opportunities.  Alter any of those elements and everything about him and how the world sees him would be unrecognizable.

So let’s look at Brady in a different way. Let’s see him as someone in the third act of the epic movie that is his life, leading a team that many expect to see in the Super Bowl. Jay Z and Kanye West’s “Made in America” is playing in the background to point out how a kid who was unfairly treated at Michigan and had to wait to the 6th round to be drafted has proved a lot of stereotypes about what it takes to be a franchise quarterback wrong.

And to those who believe we should judge a man by how he responds when dealing with the worst life has to offer with how he climbs after he hits rock bottom Tom Brady has become heroic.

And that has nothing to do with race.

But it has everything to do with your “TOURE” Guide.

(This is in direct response to the ESPN article “What if Michael Vick were white?”)

About the Author

Founder of BlackSportsOnline and BonaFide Media. @BSO. Email Robert

Displaying 26 Comments
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  1. ——> RT @BlkSportsOnline: I demand @espn reprint my "If Tom Brady was Black" article http://t.co/mEn47PR

  2. Big Al says:

    Love the job back at espn the magaize for their stupid article your the man for this one. yoo the brady pic looks like dude from barbershop

  3. Uh oh…CHALLENGE!!! RT @BlkSportsOnline: I demand @espn reprint my "If Tom Brady was Black" article http://t.co/Y52B5OU

  4. Shajwjl says:

    Who cares what color he is. All this article is doing is taking a white man and putting him into black stereotypes which is degrading to the african-american race. What if Brady was black and raised in a rich african-american family? Who cares. Mike Vick is black, he killed dogs, came back to the NFL and the media labels it a “comeback story”. Get over yourself. Brady might be white and grew up with well-off parents in Cali, but he still was picked 199th in the draft. It’s not like everything was handed to him so stop pretending it was.

    • You aren’t very bright, the whole point of article flew right over your head.

    • RollercoasterRJ says:

      Dude, read what this is in response to, re-read this article, read the last paragraph TWICE in your second reading of this article, then re-comment. You missed everything.

      Great job Robert. Nail, meet hammer.

  5. hilarious!!!!! “@BlkSportsOnline: BSO Post: What if Tom Brady Was Black? http://t.co/ZZwQRKL”

  6. D says:

    So if Tom Brady were black, he would look like Michael Ealy?

  7. Very good RT @BlkSportsOnline: I demand @espn reprint my "If Tom Brady was Black" article http://t.co/oaPqiAw

  8. is he wearing Uggs? RT @BlkSportsOnline: What if Tom Brady was Black? http://t.co/9JOmxZ8 Article http://t.co/VAHimgr

  9. Tony says:

    Rob, great article in response to that nonsense Tour’e somehow got ESPN to publish. Hats off to this post.

  10. missrook says:

    ROFL!!! This has got to be the funniest thing I’ve ever read AND Shajwjl’s comment has to be the dumbest comment ever written!! lawd help the chirren. lol

  11. Lown says:

    good article

  12. Mark says:

    Your black Tom Brady pic is 1 million times better than ESPNs white Vick. I could just turn up the contrast on Madden to get that picture.

  13. Shecky says:

    “I’ll take D.L. Hughley for $200.00, Alex..”

  14. Hi there, You’ve performed an excellent job. I will definitely digg it and for my part suggest to my friends. I am confident they will be benefited from this site.

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