I promise you this is a real story.

What?

You don’t respect the Lake Charles Professional Indoor football league?

Not like JaMarcus has a lot of options.

Rumors are swirling that former LSU and Oakland Raiders quarterback JaMarcus Russell is interested in getting back into football — this time with the Louisiana Swashbucklers.

Swashbucklers media relations director Duane Bergeron on Thursday said the organization would not confirm or deny contact with Russell or his agent.

General manager and president Chris Meaux released the following statement through Bergeron: “We are not prepared, at this time, to comment on any player-contract negotiations.”

Do they really need contract negotiations for a contract that will just include coupons to Popeye’s Chicken?

The only thing this story is missing is Antoine Walker, a shimmy, a basketball wife & a cup of sizzurp.