I forget how old I was, but I remember crying, and you are probably wondering why? Well, the first girl I had ever kissed and who was my girlfriend for I think a week (when you are in elementary school hard to remember these things) had just broke my heart. She left me for a kid named Ernest Washington who looked like Michael from Good Times but with a curl.
I didn’t understand why? I carried her books, I got her extra milk during lunch, and I walked her to the bus stop. What did I do wrong? I couldn’t understand it, so I cried and cried and cried some more.
Then in the middle of my crying, this video came on (I can’t remember if it on Rap City or YO! MTV Raps, I am getting old).
The last verse in particular caught my attention……
So listen ladies I’ll treat you
how you treat me back in return.
I’m not rude. No, I’m not stuck up
but my feelings are my main concern
So don’t think that I’d give in
cause now I know how to show
my feelings when I get involved
I’ll take it slow before I say “Oh, No”
I’ll treat you like you treat me
I’ll be straight loyal & all
So don’t take advantage of Father
Because I’ll step up but not crawl
Because I was a bit of a weird child (my mom had me tested though, I am good), I totally forgot about the girl for a minute and focused on the bigger message.
TREAT EM LIKE THEY WANTED TO BE TREATED…..
TREAT EM LIKE THEY WANTED TO BE TREATED…..
TREAT EM LIKE THEY WANTED TO BE TREATED…..
I always remembered that when I interacted with people and later on when I started my journalism career. Don’t judge, but treat them like they want to be treated.
If they want to act like a clown, see them as a clown. If a girl wants to act like a Twodel, she gets treated like a Twodel. When someone like Robert Griffin III says just see me as a QB, not a black quarterback, that is what I do.
One of the reasons why the site is called BlackSportsOnline was because mainstream media REFUSED to see us at all. It was never about treating us differently because we are black, it was just about acknowledging us and treating us like equals. If you think we suck, I can deal with that, but what I couldn’t deal with was not having an opportunity because of the color of my skin.
So trust me, I understand what it means for Michael Sam to publicly come out and say he’s proud to be a gay man, he doesn’t want to hide, and feels that his sexuality shouldn’t have anything to do with how good or bad of a football player he is.
The problem isn’t Sam, the problem is the media. We are ignoring Sam’s wishes. He has said many times that he wanted to be treated as a football player and a football player only. He has said he doesn’t want to be known as the gay football player, just the football player.
But, what are the headlines we are seeing?
I am including BSO headline in that because I am not going to lie to you like the others. We in the media push this story not for history, but for ratings, pageviews, and clicks. It is a sideshow, it is a circus, it is OMG a gay guy is playing in the NFL, what will the children think (Simpsons reference).
It is a reality show. It isn’t about Michael Sam the football player, it is about Michael Sam the gay man who happens to play football. Michael Sam will inspire a lot of people, but frankly we are doing him and the gay community a disservice by using him a prop.
The best sign of progress is when it isn’t mentioned any more. When I was at the Super Bowl in New York, I read a lot of articles, went to a lot of press conferences, and talked to a lot of fans. Not one time did I hear anyone mention the phrase “Black Quarterback” when speaking on Russell Wilson and that made me happy, that is progress.
When I use to cover events years ago, I would get these weird looks when I said my site was BlackSportsOnline and often would be the only black online person in the media room. These days people know my name and I see a lot more faces like mine, some that I helped put there. That is progress.
I am happy for all the kids that get drafted, doesn’t matter if they are gay, straight or transgender. I am not going to be fake happier for Michael Sam than I was for Johnny Manziel. I am going to treat Michael Sam like he wanted to be treated. He will get the Father MC treatment. No different than any other player.
If he does something newsworthy we will report it, and if I think you guys want to read it I will post it. Manziel kissing a model, Sam kissing his boyfriend, makes no difference to me. But, just like Manziel, Bridgewater, Clowney and any of the other draft picks………….
BALL DON’T LIE
If Sam fails or succeeds, remember to treat him how he wants to be treated…as a football player. Don’t use the gay excuse when it is convenient like many did during the draft. It is easy to say he went in the 7th round because he is gay, but if he went in the 3rd round couldn’t we have said the same thing?
The best thing we can do for Michael Sam is judge him for what he does on the field, not who he chooses to take to his bedroom. Don’t put him on a pedestal for just being himself, that is the exact the opposite of the progress we are looking for.
By the way, Ernest Washington and my one week girlfriend lasted for about three days, before she tried to come running back to me.
When I asked her why she came back, her answer was “he treated me like trash.”
My reply?
“He must have watched the video before I did…..”
I didn’t take her back. 🙂