Monday Night Raw came to us live from Louisiana for the first time since Wrestlemania XXX, and the Night of Champions go-home show was interesting to say the least. Let’s take a look at how things went down and where we stand heading into this Sunday’s pay-per-view after a night filled with interesting booking decisions that apparently were affected heavily by Monday Night Football.
And don’t forget to catch Night of Champions this Sunday on the WWE Network! How much is it you ask?
Cena Won’t Go Quietly
We start Monday Night Raw off with Paul Heyman in the ring cutting a promo on this Sunday, and he’s quickly interrupted by John Cena, who promised a fight last week. Since Brock Lesnar isn’t there, Cena is ready to pound on Paul Heyman. The one behind the one in 21-1 of course talks his way out of it, saying that Lesnar’s flight is delayed and he will be there soon. Cena doesn’t believe him because of course not, and he takes Heyman to his locker and lets him know that he has until halftime of Raw to produce the Beast or he will take the beating instead.
Periodically we see Cena’s room in the back with the Great Khali guarding it before John comes and grabs Paul and drags him out to the ring. Cena grabs the mic and says that either Heyman will make magic and produce a beast, or Cena will make Heyman’s teeth disappear with his fist.
Heyman starts talking to Cena and basically produces pure magic on the mic. Heyman says that Cena won’t hit him, because that would make him a bully like Brock Lesnar and Cena is not a bully. Heyman begs Cena to hit him and says that he won’t do it, and the only way Cena can beat the Beast is by becoming a beast. Heyman literally is begging Cena to snap at this point.
“Becomes my vision of you,” Heyman says, “As a Paul Heyman guy.”
The crowd absolutely eats it up and starts chanting YES! repeatedly. If WWE finally turns Cena heel and makes him a Paul Heyman guy? Okay let’s not get too excited because not happening, but still, okay no moving on.
Cena grabs the mic and says no, he won’t do it. Cena apologizes saying he planned this whole thing so that Heyman would produce Lesnar, and that while Heyman deserves a beating, Cena says he’s an old loud-mouthed scumbag has-been who doesn’t deserve the dirt off his hands.
Heyman then resorts to the mom/no testicles joke that all fourth-graders resort to, and Cena shoves him out of the ring because apparently a joke like that makes it okay to be a bully.
This of course cues the Brock Lesnar music, and Paul Heyman is excited.
The Beast looks fired up and ready to go as Cena bounces up and down in the ring with a smirk on his face. Lesnar picks up Heyman and then laughs as he begins to walk away from the ring. Lesnar shakes his head to Cena and says no about entering the ring, to which the crowd boos and Cena literally pouts and stomps in the ring.
Oh wait it’s time for the patented tease hitting the rings five times before getting inside thing Lesnar does. Tease 1 ends with Brock turning around and walking away while laughing before stopping and setting up tease number 2 while Cena keeps smirking.
What feels like 20 minutes passes and we finally have Lesnar on the apron and… YES HE’S IN THE RING! Lesnar and Cena tangle before Brock immediately picks up Cena and drops him with a huge German Suplex. This is SummerSlam all over again.
BUT WAIT! Super Cena rushes Lesnar and knocks him out of the ring before setting off a brawl outside. Cena is tossing Lesnar around and now they are on the ground as John shows off his brand-spanking-new ground and pound game. Michael Cole spasms in excitement all over the mic as security rushes out and breaks the two up. Things calm down with 15 security members holding Cena as Lesnar walks away laughing with what might be a legitimately broken nose.
Can. Not. Wait. For. Night. Of. Champions.
Reigns Beats Rollins in NoC Appetizer
Surprisingly, we got the Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins clash that we waited months for on Raw instead of a pay-per-view. Both men cut promos prior to the match. Reigns gave his typical short, bad-ass promo that basically had him promising to beat Rollins down until his knuckles were bleeding.
Seth is interviewed and cuts a promo on how much of a Barbarian Reigns is. He says the powerhouse is a neanderthal who walks around with his knuckles dragging on the ground, then does an uncomfortable monkey impression for some reason.
Rollins calls Reigns part-gorilla, part-Samoan and part-Rhinocerous because racism. Rollins says a Rhino is one of the most powerful animals in the world, but they aren’t very smart. It’s brains over braun every single time. Rollins says he created Roman Reigns and is responsible for everything the Samoan has accomplished in WWE. He then promises that tonight, he is going to take everything away because he is the future WWE World Heavyweight Champion and the future of the WWE, not Roman Reigns. Right.
We start things off in the ring with Rollins running away from Reigns and taking advantage of his speed early on. Rollins points to head to emphasize his brains are better than Reigns braun before heading back into the ring only for Reigns to take the advantage with a big uppercut. Rollins plays the heel well and tries to beg Reigns for mercy but just gets tossed around the ring for his troubles. Reigns slams Rollins into the barricade and into the apron then off of the steel steps and over the announce table as we head into break (Rollins did an awesome job selling the over-the-table toss by going face-first into the barricade).
We come back from commercial and somehow Rollins has recovered the face-first wall hit and is in command. The announce team continues to bring up what Rollins did to Dean Ambrose so expect him back at Night of Champions.
!!! DEAN AMBROSE CRAZY EYES ALERT!!!
Rollins is now trash-talking Reigns but misses a move in the corner and eats some big clotheslines. Reigns then hits his patented double-kick from outside the ring and nails a Superman punch before calling for the spear. Rollins jumps straight over an on-rushing Reigns and hits a strong kick to Reigns jaw that would’ve made Shawn Michaels himself proud.
Rollins goes up top but Reigns counters and goes for suplex which Rollins tries to counter only for Reigns to counter but no worries, Rollins counters the counter and throws Reigns into the corner (I’m dizzy from all the back and forth at this point).
Rollins now talking more trash but he eats a head-butt from Reigns. Rollins counters Reigns again and hits a kick combination before going for the Curb Stomp. Reigns avoids it and hits a massive spear on Rollins for the 1-2-3!
Enjoy that match? Good! It’s coming again this Sunday because hey terrible booking!
Mark Henry Rallies ‘Murica
The final segment of the go-home show before Night of Champions featured… Mark Henry and Rusev?! The World’s Strongest Man was brought out to rally America, and tells Michael Cole he’s angry that Rusev and Lana hate America. Henry says in ’96 he had to withdraw from the Olympics and it still haunts him til this day. But his match Sunday with Rusev is his second chance. Henry says that come Night of Champions he’s gonna shut Lana and Rusev up. He then tells the crowd that he promises he won’t… dramatic pause.. he can’t let them down.
Henry is mad about some Lana tweets and says she couldn’t say those things in Russia before Rusev interrupts Henry.
Lana tells Henry to shut up and says him speaking of education is funny since he only speaks propoganda. She says that in Russia they only subscribe to the facts which Americans avoid.
Lana says the education in the U.S. is declining faster than Obama’s approval rating, and she has some facts to show the crowd. First, Henry didn’t mention he competed in the ’92 Olympics because he failed there, and Russia prevailed. She calls for people to show respect for the Russian who won the ’92 gold medal. She says Henry’s confidence was shot when he witnessed Russian superiority and that’s why he faked an injury in ’96.
Henry then recites the Pledge of Allegiance for some reason before Rusev attacks and the two big men pound away at each other. Rusev works Henry into the corner as the crowd chants USA! Henry grabs Rusev and throws him across the ring before eating a huge flying kick to the face from Rusev. Lana yells for Rusev to “CRAUSH!” and he tries to lock in the Accolade but Henry fights out of it for ‘Murica! Henry throws Rusev out of the ring and celebrates by waving the American flag in the middle of the ring as Raw goes off of the air.
This whole segment was interesting. Giving Rusev a chance to shine in the final segment of a go-home show shows that the company has some big things in store for the Bulgarian Brute. But the Cold War storyline is so tired at this point, hopefully Creative can come up with something better for Rusev moving forward.
Raw is Jericho One Last Time
Good match to kick things off on Raw as Jericho and Kane put on an interesting match that didn’t really do much for story-lines but gave us a nice early 2000’s throwback, botched move included.
Kane dominates Jericho early throwing him around the ring and beating Y2J down before Jericho makes a comeback with a nice enziguiri. Jericho then hits a dropkick on Kane and strikes him with some kicks a few more times before sending outside as we had to commercial.
Back from commercial and Jericho is now fighting off a Kane rally. The Big Red Monster heads up top but Y2J counters with a nice dropkick.
Y2J looks to hit the Walls of Jericho but Kane fights out of it and throws him out of the way. Then because he’s a heel, Kane tears the turnbuckle apart and gets ready to throw Jericho into it.
Jericho counters though and hits a DDT after Kane tried chokeslamming him. Y2J looks to finish the Demon off with a Codebreaker, but hits him with a big kick before setting up a Tombstone. Another counter from Y2J who throws Kane face first into the exposed turnbuckle before getting the win with a roll-up.
Nice quick and fluid match to close out Jericho’s last Raw of his latest WWE run.
Other Results:
Sheamus & The Usos defeat Cesaro, Stardust & Goldust via pinfall
Six-man tag match to push the Cesaro/Sheamus and Uso/Star & Goldust title feuds. Typical six man tag match ended with some Uso high-flying and a 1-2-3.
Naomi defeated Cameron via submission
This match was entirely too long. That’s all I really have to say about it. Oh and Cameron tried to pin Naomi while she was on her stomach. Seriously.
You could literally hear the ref yell out “COUNT WHAT?!”
Jack Swagger defeated Bo Dallas via submission
So that Bo Dallas and Jack Swagger feud we’d been building towards for about three weeks too long came to a head… in a short match that nobody will remember. Uh, okay. Swagger wins via Patriot Lock. I still Bo-Lieve though.
Paige & Nikki Bella defeat Brie Bella & AJ Lee via pinfall
This match was actually a lot shorter than expected, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. So all three Divas in the title match this Sunday looked relatively strong, Brie got beat down and pinned and then got beat down some more by Nikki. AJ and Paige skipped, and yeah it was the same as every segment the last month with these four involved.
Big Show defeated Bray Wyatt via disqualification
This was an interesting match for WWE to trot out. Show and Wyatt had a pretty good match before Harper & Rowan came out to cause the DQ. It will be interesting to see if they go forward with this as a feud.
Dolph Ziggler & R-Ziggler defeat The Miz & Mizdown via pinfall
So apparently WWE is pushing this Miz/Ziggler feud by putting them in tag matches with stunt doubles. And also apparently it isn’t racist to joke about how much R-Truth and Ziggler look alike all match long because kayfabe. Moving on.