22. “I don’t even tweet.”
The world weeps.
23. “Let him do his political affairs and let me handle my son and let’s just stay in our lane.”
LaVar Ball and Donald Trump may well be the two people on Earth least able to stay in their lanes.
24. “Somebody asked me a question, man. I give him my opinion, but I am not taking a shot at the president.”
Under this logic, if someone asks you a question and you use that question to take a shot at someone, you are not actually taking a shot at them because you were asked a question. Got it? Good!
25. “I’m not the other guys, though. I’m not the other guys. I’m doing something else. I’m not the other guys.”
Truer words were never spoken.
26. “Can you say thank you, Mr. LaVar Ball?”
I mean….
27. “Give me a couple of reasons why you’re thanking me.”
It’s about here that things go totally off the rails. Actually that may have happened earlier. Like at the start of the interview.
28. “You don’t say thank you like any kind of word.”
Lavar Ball has many thoughts on the proper usage of the phrase “thank you.”
29. “My title is LaVar Ball, the big baller, the CEO of the Big Baller Brand.”
I can’t tell if these are tears of joy or sadness. But, either way, I’m crying.
30. “But the Chinese people were like, you know what, he’s OK. He has so much character in 18 years that he’s allow to have a pass for that.”
The Chinese people drew that conclusion about LiAngelo Ball? Man, that was fast!
31. “I just say ‘who’ to anything.”
“Who” is a good default response when anyone says anything to you.