Recently in Olympic Basketball Category

The last thing we need before the USA Basketball team captures gold is for Bean to sabotage the entire thing because of his lust for the white booty. Now, we all know Misty May-Treanor has a donk (queue the Soldier Boy Youtube for those who don't know what a "Donk" is).

Off topic, but has there ever been a more perfect porn name than Misty May? Even when she got married, it still sounded pornish. But I digress.

We need Darth to focus of the court, not for the next episode of "AssWatchers". You know when Vanessa sees this picture, he is going to have to come off "A Milli" on a diamond necklace or something. Kobe, fight the temptation; homie, fight the temptation.

As far Lebron, go for it!!!! Check out how Lebron is completely oblivious to what Chris Paul and Jason Kidd are talking about. That is the type of ass focus that pimps are legendary for.

*Edit* Emails have been flying in saying that isn't Misty May, but hey, it is much cooler to say Misty May, isn't it? If anyone can ID the athlete hit me up.

Hit me up with your thoughts up @ 404-496-5773 or on myspace @ myspace.com/kami2hot.

Two quick things about the Olympics before getting to the story of Bean and his Chinatown love:

1- The United States better not ever go to war with China.

Did you see those opening ceremonies? You should be concerned about meeting on the battlefield any country that can put on that type of display for a show. Just imagine what they could do if they decided to go bomb some countries. In essence, the USA is like Brett Favre. We have a lot of records and we are very talented, but when push comes to shove, we have a little bit of a gunslinger mentality that normally gets us in trouble. China on the other hand is like Montana to Rice. Deadly efficient, no wasted motion, in essence a serial killer. We don't want to deal with that, but while we are on serial killers.

2- Is Michael Phelps human?

There is a running debate with some friends of mine that he is actually Aquaman (not the somewhat weird Aquaman from the Super Friends days, but the cooler one from the Justice League days). The theory is that at night he jumps in the ocean and communicates with dolphins. In what was supposed to be his weakest event, the 4*400 Medley, he simply destroyed his competition and the world record. After it was over he wasn't even breathing hard. Unless one of his teammates screws up in the relay races, those eight gold medals are a lock.

Now to the story at hand. Who knew that Darth was the next ruler of the Chinese Empire? The reaction that Kobe has gotten since he arrived in Beijing has been eye opening to the point that even American journalist are puzzled by it. In the first game of the Olympic Basketball competition you would have thought Kobe was playing for the Chinese National team. What could be the explanation? My theory is that this generation of Chinese people had a lot more access to the NBA than say the Michael Jordan generation and who gets more coverage than any player in the NBA Kobe Bean Bryant. Unlike in the USA, where ESPN & a million of internet blogs (mine included) and sports-talk radio stations can corrupt a fan's perception of a player in China, all they are seeing is the raw beauty of Kobe's play.

So the next time Kobe's contract comes up, maybe instead of those overseas teams, he should check out the China Garden.

Yes, we've only won the Bronze recently! Sure, the rest of the world has embarrassed the "home" team in basketball the last eight years. And I'd concede the combined salary of the USA Men's Basketball Team exceeds the GNP of more than half of all the nations competing in the Olympics.

Now that that's out of the way, let's talk victory. Last night Canada received a beatdown of biblical proportions. 120-65? Not even in NBA Live on easy with a fantasy roster of NBA All Stars and a custom created Michael Jordan have I put the hurt on a team like Team USA did Friday night in Las Vegas.

Let's see Carmelo Anthony 24 points,Kobe Bryant and Chris Paul, 23 points each, Dwight Howard had 19 points and 7 rebounds. And the rest of the team scored in double digits except for Carlos Boozer who had 8 points and 4 rebounds.

The Dream Team. We all remember the 92 Olympics when pro athletes finally got the nod to participate in the Olympics for their country. No other team benefited more than USA in Basketball, as a team filled with names such as Jordan, Barkley, Magic, and Bird simply massacred all they saw in Barcelona.

To put it in perspective, 10 of these players that played on the team were named to the 50 greatest players to ever play between 94 feet. To say it was one of the greatest teams to ever play would be an understatement. It was the greatest team to ever suit up. They won by an average of over 40 points (43.8) and Head Coach Chuck Daly never had to use a timeout. Talk about domination.

The 96 squad wasn't as dominating, but they were more than able to handle the competition. Keeping several squad members, such as Barkley, Malone, Pippen, Robinson, and Stockton, and adding a few others like Shaq and Hakeem "The Dream", the team won by a margin of 32.3 in Atlanta. Not too shabby.

The '00 squad led by Vince Carter, was not even close to as invincible as the last two. They plowed through their games at first, but then suffered stiff competition from Lituanua twice and France. The positives are Vinsanity may have made the most jaw dropping dunk in basketball history in Sidney, and again, the USA captured the gold medal.

Watch this:

We fast forward to Athens, with the 04 Olympics. Many star players didn't want to show up. Match that with the aura of invincibility being stripped with the closeness of the Sidney Olympics. It was a disaster. Losing three games in the tournament put the Americans in 3rd place, for a bronze medal.

So, with a bittersweet memory, we must thank the 04 team for losing.