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2023 WWE Royal Rumble Predictions

Hello beautiful people! It is my honor to bring you BSO’s very first Royal Rumble Predictions! This one is looking to be an all timer, as WWE currently seems to be hitting on all cylinders ever since Triple H took over the creative side of WWE (And as of this very second of writing that is still the case and Vince McMahon is only involved in the business side, no longer the creative side). The Rumble is always a great event and WWE is continuing its use of large stadiums to host this, as this year it emanates from the 72,000 seat  Alamodome in San Antonio, Texas.  Now let’s get into the predictions! I’ll start with the ladies first.

WOMEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE WINNER: Rhea Ripley.

I mean who else could it be? If Vince McMahon still had control, I might have jokingly said Charlotte wins, then faces Bianca Belair and unifies the women’s championships, but given Triple H is at the helm all signs point to Rhea. She has made such a huge impact over the past year, and is doing some genuinely incredible work with the Judgement Day as they have gone from “Spooky dark supernatural with Edge” to “The Goth kids at the corner of the cafeteria” and they have been all the more better for it. Finn Balor and Damien Priest have been great as the big bullies of the group, and the addition of “The Ex-Con Dom” (Pun completely intended there by WWE) Dominik Mysterio has revitalized this group tenfold.  The dynamic between Rhea and Dom is the shining star of this story with brilliantly done social media angles of Dominik beating his father Rey up during the holidays, to becoming a hardened criminal after spending 2 hours in “Prison”.  Rhea has an incredible aura about her, and the WWE knows it as we see her frequently mix it up with, and get physical with, the men all the time, slamming men such as Luke Gallows and the like. Couple that, her very provocative pinning style, and the already established history between Rhea and Bianca, and all signs point to Rhea winning the rumble, and then facing Bianca Belair at Wrestlemania.

LA KNIGHT VS BRAY WYATT “PITCH BLACK MATCH”: Bray Wyatt.

I mean this one is obvious here. Bray is back with a new character, brilliantly blending his past with what he wants to do in the future with a new “Uncle Howdy” character seemingly pulling the strings of Wyatt’s fragile mind. There’s essentially a zero percent chance Knight wins this match, but he does deserve credit for really making this feud surprisingly good as Knight is one of the best promo guys in the game (YEAH!) and deserves a spot against a huge talent like Bray. What is a pitch black match you might be asking? Well who the hell knows but it’s sponsored by Mountain Dew’s newest flavor, you guessed it, pitch black. Maybe the lights are off and spooky stuff happens with Bray, but Bray is winning.

ALEXA BLISS VS BIANCA BELAIR (c): Bianca Belair.

As mentioned above, all signs point towards Bianca vs Rhea. They were the final two in last year’s rumble and Rhea vs Bianca has been teased several times by WWE in the past year, and it really isn’t common that champions lose at the Rumble, as it’s Mania season and those plans are probably in place already. Alexa, to her credit, has been doing good with this new wrinkle to her character, tying in the return of Bray Wyatt and incorporating her history with him. There might be some spooks, there might be an Uncle Howdy, but at the end of the day Alexa will fall victim to the KOD and Bianca will retain.

KEVIN OWENS VS ROMAN REIGNS (c): Roman Reigns.

Duh. However credit to Kevin Owens for doing what makes great babyfaces great, giving you the hope and belief that the good guy will overcome the bad guy. His work in this feud, and in the bloodline story in general has been fantastic, tying in his real life friendship with Sami Zayn. The contract signing at the January 20th episode of Smackdown was incredible, outsmarting the bloodline and powerbombing Reigns through the table to a Herculean pop. This would lead into the Tribal Court, where Sami would face judgement by his chief, in just an epic segment, and something I will dive deeper into in another article. However, I have a better shot of growing to be 7 feet tall and getting signed by the Lakers than Owens does of winning this match. Acknowledge your Chief.

MEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE: Sami Zayn.

This one is so hard. I’m predicting Sami with about 40% certainty here. I want to be clear, I might be very wrong on this one because there’s three other candidates that have an equal shot of winning this thing: Cody Rhodes, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, and “Stone Cold” Steve Austin. Cody Rhodes is returning from his superhuman effort at Hell In A Cell against Seth Rollins, where he worked a match with a broken freaking pec. For about the past few months, everyone and their mom would swear that Cody was on a collision course to win the Rumble and be the one that defeats Reigns, ever since making his epic comeback at Wrestlemania. However these past few months, Sami Zayn has undeniably captured the hearts of everyone watching, proving he still is that incredible babyface he was in NXT (Booked by Triple H mind you). Rhodes, however, has also mirrored Triple H, as Hunter also was someone that tore a muscle (His quad), then had video montages teasing his return, then winning the Royal Rumble in 2002. Does Triple H rewrite history with this? Very possible. The Rock might also win because, well he’s The Rock. But the prospect of big cousin Dwayne coming back to put Roman in his place at the table writes itself. However, due to the epic flop of Black Adam, and Dave Meltzer reporting Dwayne isn’t in wrestling shape to face Roman, he might not even show. The final one, the wild card, is ol Stone Cold. Sean Ross Sapp of fightful.com recently reported Austin was offered “Big money” for a match against Reigns at Wrestlemania. Seeing as the Rumble is in Austin’s homestate of Texas, and Austin recently posting several videos of him working out, the Texas Rattlesnake might have gotten the itch again, so there’s also a damn good chance we hear glass break at entrant number 30, and Austin goes for one last ride at Wrestlemania. However I think Zayn wins because that is, in my opinion, the right thing for the story. Should Zayn win, and go on to defeat Reigns at Wrestlemania, we will be talking about this bloodline story as the greatest story professional wrestling has ever told.

To conclude, this Rumble is shaping up to be one of the most unpredictable Rumbles in WWE history, and anyone with a pulse needs to tune in and witness what might be a show for the ages. The Royal Rumble is this Saturday, January 29th, at 8pm est on Peacock.

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